gemaine's Xanga

* Silence Is Not Always Golden *

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 10:19:08 GMT

Now that I'm left all alone in the meeting room while the colleagues are away for dinner, I hear the silence.

They say it's golden but I say it's deafening.

Because in the silence, the inner thoughts are amplified.

The throbbing headache is in sync like an orchestra aimed to mentally torment the soul.

I'm glad I will be flying off to Sabah on Saturday.

It will be like a mini holiday from everything.

I can't wait.

* Of Stolen Hopes *

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:44:25 GMT

I gave up on putting high hopes since 2007.

Recently, I managed to gain back a little.

But you took it away...

and more this time around.

Well done.

* Just Another Blue Monday *

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 12:58:05 GMT

Hello world! I am blogging unnecessarily because I am procrastinating on my work.

Therefore, blog I shall and work later, I will... I hope.

So, I woke up feeling like crap but I refrained from whining, moaning and bitching. Ok, maybe I did just a little.

It all got better when I started indulging in my Coke Light.

I am tired as hell right now because I only had four hours of sleep out of which I woke up practically every 15 minutes or so to cough or to drink water to ease my itchy throat.

So one can only imagine how grumpy I was. I drove in silence down town to my client's place which sits beautifully opposite KLCC. Yes, in silence. Gem being quiet is a rare scene indeed. Those who know me well enough would know Gem is almost never quiet and for those who still thinks that I am quiet, you probably don't know me enough.

That's beside the point. Anyway, fast forward through the day to night, I literally drove through a drive-thru.

LoL.

I forgot to order and went straight to the pick-up place.

Genius.

But I couldn't help it. I was dead tired and being stuck in the jam wasn't much help.

And to top it off with a cherry, I almost sprained my ankle just now. In fact, my ankle feels kind of sore right now.

I'm hoping I won't see an elephant's ankle tomorrow morning.

Anyway, contemplating on sleeping early and waking up early for work or getting some work done and waking up a wee bit later tomorrow.

Hrm...

Decision, decision, decision.

Bleah. I'll go get some work done now.

Waking up early is not exactly my top 5 things in the world.

Until my next procrastination.

* Of Random and Nonsensical Nothings *

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 16:50:22 GMT

So, many have mentioned that I have been very emotional lately.

No one to blame but my nature of being easily influenced by my *ahem* hormones.

Furthermore, I will only blog when I have the time to sit down. And usually when I have the time to sit down, I would think a lot. Mostly unnecessary things that will make me emo but that's me.

I am emo now but I shall pick the happier parts to blog about because I don't want to look back in 10 years time only to see a blog filled with emo and depressing entries because I have happy moments in my life as well.

It's funny how we would enjoy the happy moments and forget to jot them down but I believe, most moments whether happy or sad will be stored in our memories forever. In my case, I don't know for how long since I have limited memory space.

But I guess it would be good to write happy moments somewhere and someday when I'm older and hopefully not so wrinkly, I can look back and read about the happy moments to refresh my slightly-tarnished memory on the good times.

So yes, tonight was a good night. Had dinner with the girls at Ninja Jones to celebrate Zia's 24th. Well, sort of a celebratory dinner. The pumpkin pudding there was awesome possum. Joked and laughed quite a bit which was fun, relaxing and not taxing at all.

Recently, certain people and certain events have been really taxing for me. Caring too much about what others think and feel is tiring at times. Too tiring. The fact that I have been having sleepless nights due to my nagging cough for two whole weeks does not help at all.

Somehow I have a feeling this entry is going to lead back to me emo-blabbing again but it's alright cause it's my blog and I rant if I want to.

Anyhoo, mom's away in Taiwan for holiday which is making me feel holiday-sick. Is there even such a term? Yes, I feel like going for a holiday. Doesn't have to be far. Just away from here. That would be good.

Will be heading to Sabah this weekend. Can't wait to feast on the cheap and fresh seafood I've heard all about. Then again, work awaits there. Oh well.

I should be going to bed as I have to wake up in approximately 6 hours time for work but my cough mixture is not doing me any good and the fact that I have something lingering in my mind and at the same time, it's draining me emotionally, does not help much.

Think happy thoughts.

Pumpkin pudding =)

Ooh, lesson learnt for the night: Never ever remove avocado seeds with a knife... not that I would anyway. Reason being: my brother bravely attempted to remove one with a knife and managed to stab his finger and had to get 6 stitches.

Ouch.

On a random note, I have successfully collected 8 stickers for the Guardian Big Headz thingy.

I really want the Hippo! It's so cute I want to squeeze it to death.

But I have 32 more to go...

o.O

Anyway, what someone said was right. I'd have to make a choice.

Whether to wait and know for sure or not to wait and have myself wondering 'what if?' for the rest of my life.

Question is... is it worth the wait?

Because I know damn sure I will not get my answer now.

So how?

And also, what someone else said is right. Even though we didn't notice it ourselves but that doesn't mean it's not true.

Sucks that... that someone is right.

Rawr. Off to bed. Goodnight world.

* Sigh *

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 15:54:57 GMT

Why is it so tiring with you?

Is it supposed to be this hard?

You said that sometimes people just don't try hard enough.

But is it worth trying this hard?

Especially when it feels like I'm the only one trying?

* Just One Of Those Days *

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 13:36:09 GMT

Ever had one of those days...

You just don't want to talk...

You just need someone to sit beside you in silence...

And give you a big warm hug...

So that you'll know tomorrow is going to be better day.

* Because I'm Sugar High and Blogging Makes Me Happy *

Mon, 26 Oct 2009 15:07:52 GMT

I just googled "one tablespoon equals how many teaspoons".

My cough mixture says two teaspoons.

I had one tablespoon.

One tablespoon = 3 teaspoons

Obedient as I am. Oh no! One extra teaspoon?

Maybe I should take another tablespoon and then I can skip the next two dosage.

Awesome.

Ok, the sugar high is getting to me.

Off I go to bed for a good night's sleep.

No wonder, I slept so well last night... and probably tonight.

One teaspoon goes a long way for a non-junky like me!

p.s. It's really the sugar talking!

* I Swear I Don't Need Anger Management *

Mon, 26 Oct 2009 10:39:58 GMT

Something triggered me and it moved me to blog about my top 10 but I can only think of a few... so, my top few pet peeves.

1) People who takes the lift to go up one floor when the bloody escalator is positioned right in front of the lift! For goodness sake, just use the damn escalator please! There are many people waiting to use the lift and although sometimes it may only be one floor above but there are certain concepts where only the lift will be able to bring us to our desired floor (ie: the carpark). Stop wasting my lunch time!

2) People who choose their shopping cart WAY too carefully. Hello? You're not going to marry the damn cart and spend the rest of your life with it, just pick one and go! I understand if you would want to check if the wheels are working or not but if it's because the cart is a little rusty or the colour's fading, go bring your own personal cart and stop hogging the damn space.

3) People who drives at 40km/hr on the fast lane. I know I'm no F1 driver but MUST you people take the story of the Tortoise and the Hare so LITERALLY. Hello? 40km/hr is just too much!

4) People who strolls... literally... in a busy street. I know that life is too short and we should all slow down and appreciate the beauty of the world but would you kindly take it some place else where the streets are not as busy and birds are happily chirping away?

5) People who knows that others are waiting for them to get out of their bloody parking space but takes their own sweet time. This usually applies to women (sorry but it's true). If you have to touch up your make-up, do your hair or whatever, please note that not only is one car waiting for you to get out but along with the rest of the cars lining up behind nicely waiting for your highness to be done with a touch of lipgloss.

6) People who avoids questions and that would probably include me and you.

Ok, I'm happy now. See? I don't need anger management...

Right? =)

* Of Mine *

Sun, 25 Oct 2009 12:43:38 GMT

I may seem like I'm a happy partying girl who doesn't seem to care about a thing in the world because all I want to do I have fun but little do people know, I am just another average joe.

This shoulder of mine can only take that much weight.

These legs of mine can only walk that far alone.

These hands of mine still wants to be held.

These ears of mine still wants to hear your whispers.

These eyes of mine still cries.

This heart of mine still breaks.

This mind of mine is still thinking of you.

* Second Goodbye *

Tue, 13 Oct 2009 07:08:05 GMT

I was just having a random thought. As usual.

If you were given a chance to spend one more last time together with someone whom you know you will not have a future with, would you?

Or would you rather not?

Because it will definitely hurt to say goodbye... again.